Should I start taking alli on a Friday night when I have no plans for the weekend? That way I could stay near the all-important bathroom facilities for two days.

Yes, and over a long weekend, too. Give yourself the best chance you can to adjust. I wouldn't start on a weekend that starts out with important meetings or anything like that, either.

I don't want to wait that long. But maybe by the time I cut back on fat enough to give me confidence that I won't have a really bad accident, it will be Labor Day already.